Quotes From The Breakfast Club II

Bender: Dork,
Brian: Yeah?
Bender: You are a parents wet dream, OK?
Brian: Well, that's the problem.
Bender: Look, I can see you getting all bunged up for them making you
wear these kind of clothes.
But face it, you're a neo-maxi-zoom-dweebie.
What would you be doing if you weren't out making yourself a better citizen?
Andrew: Why do always have to insult everybody?
Bender: I'm being honest, asshole. I would expect you to know the difference.
Andrew: Yeah well he has a name.
Bender: Yeah?
Andrew: Yeah. Whats your name?
Brian: Brian.
Andrew: See?
Bender: My condolences.

Bender: Uh, Carl?
Carl: What?
Bender: Can I ask you a question?
Carl: Sure.
Bender: How does one become a janitor?
Carl: You want to be a janitor?
Bender: No, I just want to know how one becomes a janitor because
Andrew here is very interested in persuing a career in the custodial arts.

Bender: What are we having?
Brian: Just your normal everyday lunch.
Bender: Milk?
Brian: Soup.... Apple juice.
Bender: I can read. PB & J with the crusts cut off. Well Brian, this is a very nutricious lunch.
All the food groups are represented. Did your mom marry Mr. Rogers?
Brian: No, Mr. Johnson.

Andrew: All right, what about your family?
Bender: Oh mine? Its real easy. [As Dad]Stupid worthless no good goddamn free loadin' son of a bitch retarded big mouth know it all asshole jerk! [As Mom]You forgot ugly lazy and disrespectful- [As Dad]shut up bitch! Go fix me a turkey pot pie! [As him]What about you dad? [As Dad]Fuck you. [As him]No, dad, what about you? [As Dad]Fuck you. [As him]No dad what about you?! [As Dad]Fuck you!
Brian: Is that for real?
Bender: Want to come over sometime?

Vernon: What if your home, what if your family, what if your dope was on fire?
Bender: Impossible, sir. It's in Johnson's underwear.

Allison: I'll do anything sexual and I don't need a million dollars to do it either.
Claire: You're lying.
Allison: I already have. I've done just about everything there is except a
few things that are illegal. I'm a nymphomaniac.
Claire: Lie.
Brian: Are your parents aware of this?
Allison: The only person I told was my shrink.
Andrew: And what did he do when you told him?
Allison: He nailed me.
Claire: Very nice.
Allison: I don't think that from a legal standpoint what he did could be
construde as rape since I paid him.
Claire: He's an adult.
Allison: Yeah, and he's married.
Claire: Ugh! Do you have any idea how completely gross that is?
Allison: Well the first few times-
Claire: First few times? You mean you did it more than once?
Allison: Sure.
Claire: Are you crazy?
Brian: Obviously she's crazy if she's screwing a shrink.
Allison: Have you ever done it?
Claire: I don't even have a psychiatrist.
Allison: Have you ever done it with a normal person?
Claire: Didn't we already cover this?
Bender: You didn't answer the question.
Allison: Its kind of a double-edged sword, isn't it?
Claire: A what?
Allison: Well, if you say you haven't you're a prude. If you say you have, you're a slut.
Its a trap. You want to but you can't and when you do you wish you didn't, right?
Claire: Wrong.
Allison: Or are you a tease?
Andrew: She's a tease.
Claire: Why don't you just forget it.
Andrew: You're a tease and you know it. All girls are teases.
Bender: She's only a tease if what she does get you hot.
Claire: I don't do anything.
Allison: Thats why you're a tease.

Bender: You won't accept a boy's tongue in your mouth, and yet you're willing to eat that?
Claire: Can I eat?
Bender: I don't know. Give it a try.

The Breakfast Club: Dear Mr. Vernon, we accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole saturday in detention for whatever it is we did wrong, but we think you're crazy for making us write an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us, in the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But what we found out, is that each one of us is a brain, and an athlete, and a basketcase, a princess, and a criminal. Does that answer your question?
Sincerely yours, The Breakfast Club.

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